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Welcome to! America’s Healthcare Business is a Joke – As our name, with its unique spelling, indicates; we wholeheartedly believe everything from going to see your doctor, to going to the pharmacy to pick up medicine, to undergoing surgery, and rehabilitation needs to be more simple and far less-expensive.

Read our Mission Statement, or check out the menu above for more.

Let’s take a moment to acknowledge all of the fine folks turning up at all levels to keep healthcare happening. They’re vastly underappreciated during the best of times. After a solid year+ of the Covid-19 pandemic, those people all deserve a solid paid year off, or two!

Being a Type One diabetic, I need insulin and have for more than 20 years. Insurance won’t cover it until they’ve had time to review the doctor’s notes. Despite having the prescription, the pharmacy won’t let me pay cash to get some insulin, because it is illegal to sell insulin to someone who is insured.

I came home, and made this shirt, and we sell it for >$15

It says, “It was easier, and it was less-expensive getting this shirt, than it is getting the life-saving medication I need”

Shortly after the drunken meeting where we agreed to form, we agreed that we ought to put our spin on the universally known and widely accepted generic drug, Fukitol. brand Fukitol packs a surprising punch, altering your attitude to a point where disregarding even the most pressing, significant challenges is a breeze! Just apply any brand Fukitol to your body in the standard fashion, and repeat, “Fukitol,” to yourself until your concerns have properly faded!

Available in the Unisex Classic Tee, as well as the fashionable Women’s Tank

Our URL & Slogan makes for a good passive protest against high healthcare costs, and is contextually cool anywhere.

This Tank runs from $13.40 for the small, up to $16.65 for the 2XL.

Same as above, but it’s unisex, so a dude can wear it.

This one will run you from $15.28 on the Small, to $19.86 on the 3XL.

As any successful business does, once we sold our first few Logo Shirts, we went looking to expand. One of our staff members, Rob, claims he discovered Ninety Six [96] Cotton Sticks around 10 years ago and ever since, he swears by them saying that using one to clear out his ears is the most satisfying thing ever.

Turns out, Cotton Sticks’ manufacturer was looking to retire, and sell the business to someone who would keep up the high standard his company has established. We spoke with him at length about how utterly broken the US Healthcare system is, and explained what is all about. We were able to acquire Ninety Six [96] Pharmapseudocal & Boiled Peanuts at a very favorable rate.

The Boiled Peanuts operation was just gravy!

Visit Ninety Six Pharmapseudocal & Boiled Peanuts, or head right on over to grab this shirt!

On our drive back to the Chicagoland Area from South Carolina, we found a modest chiropractor’s office in Bone Gap, Illinois.

After getting us good and liquored up, the chiropractor sold us his small practice. Having grown the practice significantly, Bone Gap Back & Spinal Tap has spared no expense to bring in world-class physicians and distinguished therapists across a range of specialties.

Always worth the scenic drive to Edwards County, our Spine Center is perhaps best-known for its after-hours, when Bone Gap Back & Spinal Tap opens the Tap Out Back, an outdoor drinking and dining establishment.

Visit them online, or grab the shirt!

As previously stated, is now in the Boiled Peanuts business. While we were reluctant to continue operating the series of roadside stands dotting South Carolina, Tennessee, Georgia, and Florida at first, Boiled Peanuts now account for nearly 30% of our revenue.

We figure – Let’s start marketing this stuff and see how big it can get!

Nothing quite says like our Magic Hat and pestle logo! Get in on raising hell about the cost of medicine in America with this wonderful looking shirt!

We're also geography buffs

If you’ve ever heard of Bone Gap, Illinois, or Ninety Six, South Carolina; you’re more tuned in to the fun that is unfrequented America. is pleased to offer relevant garb pointing out the location of those towns.

Thank You!

We appreciate your involvement.